Saturday, 28 January 2012

POWER OF SELF-WORTH:Learning to love oneself.

As African women,we have come a long way since the days when our only relevance was carrying water on our heads.We have become leaders and innovators in different fields. Over the past decades,women all over the world have taken strides in combating gender inequality and suppression but at times its us as women who give in to our male counterparts primarily because we fail to master the art of self-worth. Learning to love oneself is an empowering venture that is neccessary for every woman to attain. With self-love comes a whole new outlook on life,a power unknown to those who lack self-adoration. Reports of domestic violence continue to soar throughout Africa every single day. According to the National Centre for Victims of Crime,1 in every 4 women experience an abusive relationship in their lifetime and I was shocked to discover the only reason these women still stay in the relationships is they fear being alone! Shocking as it is, it is very true.Women tend to have this need to rely on some one else to complete their being, but the truth is no one can ever measure up to all your expections except for you.

It should never take someone else to make you feel complete, you are the only person that can never let you down. Self-worth, self-competency, self-regard, whatever you term it is simply the practice of loving oneself and attaching a positive meaning to one's life. I believe the first step to emancipation is self realization, a satisfaction of who you are and who you can be as an individual. Every sister deserves some 'me time', a time alone to reflect on your life;where you have been where you are and where you are heading. Learning to understand yourself and your capabilities is important as well,you are emperor of your life and loving yourself is an essential part of achieving greatness and longevity. As long as we harbour that need for alpha-male to play "hero" in our lives,we will surely find difficulty in freeing ourselves from male dominance. Lack of self-worth is why at times women of distinction,doctors and lawyers still wind up in abusive relationships. Once you realise your self-importance,the value you possess as a woman,you have immeasurable power to change the situations around you.

According to the National Association for Self-Esteem, lack of self-adoration in young women leads to "poor choices that can sabotage success and interfere with healthy maturity". Healthy self-esteem ensures success in endeavours, frees women to make wise lifestyle choices and helps them build and maintain healthy relationships.The belief that you deserve to be happy is more powerful than most people realise. Having self-esteem means that you believe you are capable of meeting challenges as they occur, and that you have the right and are worthy of being happy. A woman can never go wrong if she allocates enough value and love to herself. If young women all over could learn to love and value themselves,they would think twice before indulging in harmful practices. Self-adoration cultivates a respect for oneself, a respect that will never allow one to indulge in drug abuse,prostitution or abortion and other menaces that exist in our societies. More women would have the strength to walk away from the hands of men who don't treat them right.

There are plenty examples of women who have walked from powerful men and made a names for themselves, the likes of Hillary Clinton or closer to home Nkosazana Dlamini-Zuma,ex-wife of SA President, the power that motivated these women is that of self-love,a belief that they did not deserve crude conditions and they could become better human beings on their own. A woman can never go wrong if she allocates enough value and love to herself. The issue of self-love is not just a phsycological or emotional issue,it involves physical well-being as well. I'm sure a good number of people would agree with me that some people just dont seem to care about their look. As women we are affected by the way we look on the outward,if you look good ,you feel good and if you feel good,you are bound to shine. Self-neglect is an indicator of the absence of self-love,the way one looks says a lot about how they feel about themselves! Once you have have inco-operated self-love in your life,you are bound to look and feel like a million dollars(trust me on this one!.

Remember loving yourself is the greatest love of all!.

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