Liane
is a very bright woman. She has a stable position and is very competent at what
she does. Her friends find her incredibly interesting and hard-working at the
same time. Liane is not vulnerable, she is strong and professional. But she has
a secret: Liane is in an abusive relationship.
Her
husband beats her up and she cries a lot, wishing the pain would stop. The next
day, at work, when people ask why she has marks all over her body, she lies.
Liane is ashamed. Even though she is a very powerful woman, she cannot find the
strength to denounce her husband. She loves him. He is what she has, without
him her family would be apart.
After
her husband beats her up, he apologizes and she believes he is trying to change
his behavior. Liane is scared of him. She cannot go out with her friends or
work with male colleagues: he is very jealous. But it is love. She cannot break
the marriage up just because of some arguments they’ve had.
If
you know somebody at the same situation as Liane, talk to them. These women
might only need someone to talk to at first, so that they can come forward to
the authorities. Domestic violence doesn’t end when the husband apologizes. In
fact, it is very likely that the hurtful behavior appears again.
These attitudes
can destroy a relationship if not treated correctly by the authorities. There
are also centers that focus on dealing with the aggressiveness of these women’s
male partners. Most of
the times, these women are left feeling insecure and blame themselves for being
beaten up. They try to hide the fact because they feel ashamed or afraid. These
women live in fear. There is nothing slightly interesting or exciting about
living in terror.
The
correct step is to talk to the victim or to those who are close to her, in
order to facilitate the process of seeking help. Do that if not for the sake of
the relationship than for the victim’s life. Many times the violence has gone
too far, and the husband feels like the owner of the victim’s life. Sometimes,
after she has had the strength to come clean about the aggressions, the male
partner ends up killing the victim just because he is used to violating her
wishes and treating her badly. Domestic violence is a sign that the male
partner can do more and harm the victim’s life in a more permanent manner.
Abuse
relationships are quite common, but the victim tends to deny she is in a
typical harmful position because she loves her partner and doesn’t believe that
he is aggressive and needs treatment. Domestic
violence is not the victim’s fault. It is important to mention that it can also
happen in lesbian relationships, in which the aggressor threats to tell the
woman’s family about her homosexuality.
Regardless
of the gender, any kind of aggression is harmful if not physically, than
psychologically to the victim’s life. Don’t pretend you haven’t seen the signs!
Don’t connive with violence and abuse!
I
know Liane personally, but I am sure that you also know someone who resembles
her. Help the many Lianes who are chained by the sufferings of an abusive
relationship!! Take a stand!!!
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