This past week has
been pretty interesting online: from discovering the dichotomy among
feminists, to laughing my head off at Buzzfeed’s new list of funnies for internet feminists. Over the last week, I found a lot of women online
insinuating that Karvachauth was anti-feminist. And that got me thinking. Are
we becoming crazily antagonistic to men, ignoring the actual notion of equality that underlies true feminism?
Ayuh, dis sounds about right! |
My understanding of
feminism – (this may or may not be substantiated by academic theory, and
I
claim no expertise on my part to assert that my idea of feminism is the
absolute truth) - is that it
is a promoter of equality. Not absolute equality or the warped notion
that a man = woman = man = woman. But rather, equality warts and all.
Equality among equals, equality of respect and value, and equality of
worth.
To my mind, feminism is about seeking the empowerment
of women, and by extension, of men. To my mind, empowerment is truly attained
when a human being is sovereign over their mind and body, and the attainment of
the state of understanding and acceptance that every individual’s mind and body
is theirs only, and not for another to pass judgment on or impose upon unreasonable
restraints, encroachments and demands.
With that in place, it does not disturb me
that there are women and girls who choose to veil themselves in different parts
of the world of their own volition. With that in place, it does not disturb me
that there are women who choose to fast for their husbands’ longevity from dawn
until the moon appears in the night sky.
Why? Because each of
these women makes the choices they actively believe in, and endorse. And in
doing so, they are entirely free and liberated. She made the choice, and she
must (and will) deal with the consequences. Why brand her a scion
of all things anti-feminist, when she is simply doing something of her own
volition, something no one compels her to do, something she does because she
wants to?
The trouble creeps in
when these things are imposed. Imposed veiling, imposed rituals, imposed
obligations, imposed rules that a woman must be subservient to a man. For when
there is an imposition, there is an encroachment of individuality. When there is
an encroachment of individuality, there is an erosion of empowerment. When
there is an erosion of empowerment, there is an absolute disregard for
identity. And when identity is disregarded, as a natural corollary, dominance
prevails.
Being a feminist is the
one part of my identity that I am happiest about. But that does not mean I hate
men, or
Oh hai. I is Feminist. |
For me, feminism is about
celebrating the differences that men and women bring to the table. It is about not
just recognising those differences, but complementing them with each of our own
contributions. Men and women are both valuable to society: one can’t survive
without the other, and the entire human race will crumble in seconds if one is
wiped out while the other remains. There is something that
intricately links the survival of society and the acceptance of this truth.
For me, feminism is about loving all the men as much as the women in my life for making it what it is.
Telling you that I am a feminist feels great. It feels like a mug of steaming coffee early in the morning. Warm, fuzzy and home-like.
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